Couples' breathwork has the power to reignite that flame and heal old wounds. This powerful mindfulness technique can help partners reach a deeper level of intimacy both emotionally and physically. We'll explore how it works and teach you mindfulness methods for emotional healing and intense tantric techniques.
What is Couple Breathwork?
Couples breathwork is a technique where partners synchronize the rhythm and flow of their breath. This is an extremely powerful way to feel immediate intimacy as a couple. When we practice breathwork we're activating the parasympathetic nervous system through stimulation of the vagus nerve.
The vagus nerve is our major communication centre that connects the brain stem to all of our major organs. It's responsible for regulating emotion. When stimulated there's a release of chemicals that helps to bring our physiology back to a calm and open state. This calm state can elicit a release of stagnant emotion, greater awareness, feeling more open and greater sexual intimacy.
Benefits of Couples Breathwork
We often forget that we are primal beings. Our most fundamental instinct is to protect ourselves from any perceived threat. Emotional hardships in a relationship can trigger this threatened response leading to miscommunication, repressed feelings and a build up of resentments that are all stored in the body.
When you synchronize your breath and oxygenate the brain your body enters a state of total relaxation; your brain sends out signals that you're safe and as a result you feel more present, connected and open.
This sense of vulnerability can help to connect you on a level that you haven't experienced before. It may provoke a release of unresolved emotional experiences, memories and challenges in the relationship, as you access parts of the subconscious mind that are generally laying dormant. We hold our emotional trauma in the body, when you practice deep breathing you can experience a visceral physical release of that store trauma. Here are some more of the benefits of the this practice:
- Increased emotional awareness
- Deeper sexual connection
- Release of past trauma and hardships
- Acceptance and a feeling of gratitude toward each other
- Understanding of each other's current mindset
- Having present and conscious moments together
- Accessing each other's needs
- Enhancing trust and openness
How To Do Couples Breathwork Exercises
Below are two couples breathwork techniques both used for different results. The back to back breath is for more mindful emotional healing and the tantric breath is for sexual intimacy and release. Play some music if it feels right or solfeggio frequencies for a more serious experience. Ensure that the room feels safe, is warmly lit and that you won't be disturbed during the practice.
Back to Back Breath
This technique is for a more serious and conscious connection. Sitting back to back will allow for a little privacy when experiencing emotional release, whilst still maintaining physical connection. To begin, choose a partner to lead the rhythm of the breath, the deeper you go the more intense the experience will be.
- Set a soft timer for 5 minutes and another for 10 minutes
- Sit cross legged back to back on the floor
- Get comfortable ensuring your spines are straight
- Close your eyes
- Get into a comfortable rhythm with the breath, letting the chosen person lead
- Increase the depth of the breath - inhaling through the nose deeply and out of the mouth in a circular motion
- Focus on your own body and feel the breath enter in the nose and out the mouth, feel your belly and chest move and notice the sensations you're feeling
- Shift your focus to your partner's body and notice the way your skin touches and your bodies move
- When the 5 minute timer sounds return to a normal breathing pattern, maintaining synchronicity, relax and allow any emotions to come up
Tantric Couples Breath
Tantric couples breath is an intimate breathwork technique that will intensify sexual connection, as you sit face to face. You can practice this technique sitting cross legged face to face or sitting on the floor with your legs wrapped around each other, ensuring that you're comfortable enough to take very deep breaths. Choose one partner to take the lead on the breath and for the other to follow, the deeper you go with the inhale, the more intense the experience will feel.
- Take your desired sitting position ensuring that your spines are straight
- Take one hand and place it on your partner's chest
- Take the other hand and hold your partner's hand as it sits on your chest
- Look into each other's eyes as you begin to synchronize the natural rhythm of your breath
- When ready, close your eyes
- Breathe deeply together in through the nose into the belly and then the chest and hold at the top of your head for 3 seconds release through your mouth with an audible sigh
- Repeat this breath between 10-30 times depending on your desired intensity
- After you've completed the breath relax into each other, hold each other or do whatever feels natural while maintaining a natural synchronized breath for as long as desired
Couple's Journal
If you'd like to dive deeper and connect on another level our couple's journal "How to Figure Sh*t Out Together" will take you there. How to Figure Sh*t Out Together was designed for you to connect on a level you never have before. You'll have tough conversations, cheeky ones too, you'll laugh together and maybe even cry a little.
Final Thoughts
Couples' breathwork exercises can be truly transformational for your relationship. The changes of your physiology hen practicing the breath will allow both partners to relax, feel safe, calm and open. This can lead to very powerful emotional release in the way of crying or trembling or a feeling of euphoria and freedom. If you're looking to deepen your emotional and physical connection give these techniques a try and feel the results for yourself.
